The Expert Escapist
The Expert Escapist, old Zuckerman Zotts,
made quite a good living escaping from knots.
He shouted too proudly, “Come people and see:
tie knots all around me and I will break free!”
On Wednesdays and Tuesdays, old Z’ would invite
the folks who were watching to tie him up tight.
And strong men and women would bind him with rope.
But could their knots hold him? Well could they? Well… nope!
But one who was watching (you know it was me)
Said, “I’ll tie a knot and you’ll never get free.”
So I was invited by Zuckerman Zotts
up onto the stage where I bound him in knots.
He struggled and fumbled and grabbed at my noose.
The expert escapist just couldn’t break loose.
He picked at the knot ’till his fingers were sore
(and nobody wanted to watch anymore).
Then Zuckerman Zotts said, “It’s sad but it’s true:
that this is a knot that I cannot undo…
Explain it,” he asked me, “Explain to me, son,
how you’ve tied a knot that can not be undone.”
I showed him my shoelace and said, “Looky here:
I tied it that way and it’s stayed for a year.”
The expert escapist exclaimed with a sigh,
“I guess that’s the one knot that I can’t untie.”
I’d hoped he’d escape when I tied him that day.
I can’t take it off when it’s tied up this way.
But now I am sure since the expert has tried,
that no one untangles the knots that I’ve tied.
We’ll never undo them, as much as we try.
One tangled-up twosome, the expert and I.
The expert escapist, old Zuckerman Zotts…
He’s good at escaping… I’m better at knots.