1483 – On The Wrong End

On The Wrong End
“I don’t know how to tell you this, pal, but… looks like you’ve got butt antlers.”

I Wished for Horns

I made a wish that I could have
a pair of healthy horns,
like kudus, gnu, or ibex do,
or mythic unicorns.

How marvelous! How fabulous!
How handsome they would be!
The pair I grew, how helpful too
the horns could be for me.

I’d always have a home to hang
my hat upon my rack.
They’d scratch and scritch that loathsome itch
that lingers on my back.

I wished for horns, but didn’t ask
to have them on my head,
so now they grow a little low:
they’re on my rump instead.